|Doing dishes - photo copyright © 2013 Mandy Ross|
Just like Bug getting mad at Boy Wonder who has yet to unload the dishwasher. He’s not slacking off; he just hasn’t gotten to it yet. His dad told him to have it done by the time he gets home after work. It’s not even noon yet, but, she’s in the kitchen putting up the dishes that are clearly his chore. I told her that she can’t be mad at her brother for not doing his chore when she didn’t give him the time to do it. She knows that their dad said that their chores had to be done for them to go to the lake this weekend and she wants to make sure that they get to go. So, after nagging her brother to do it, and him choosing to finish his video game first, frustration got the better of her and she took matters into her own hands.
I think this is probably what happened to my sister and me when we were kids. My sister got tired of nagging and I didn’t feel any hurry to get it done, so she just started doing it for me. It’s so weird to see parts of my personality and parts of my sister’s emerging in my children as they interact with one another. It’s definitely helping me to realize that things weren’t the way either one of us thought they were.
I honestly thought she wanted to do my chores, because them being undone was driving her crazy and it was just easier for her to do it herself. If she didn’t do them, I would get to them eventually. It didn’t really matter to me if she did them or I did them, as long as they got done by the time our parents got home or before I went to bed. I didn’t get mad at her if I had to do my own chores, but I didn’t appreciate her nagging me about them either. I don’t do well with nagging, especially if I know it needs to be done and I’m the one who’s supposed to do it. I don’t think anyone likes to be in that position, especially when the deadline isn’t looming so close that you couldn’t possibly get it done in time.
Once Boy Wonder had beaten his video game, he came out of his room to unload the dishwasher and put up the dishes. He found Bug up on a stepstool putting up the plates. He helped her finish putting up the dishes and then they walked out of the kitchen to go play a game together. Eventually, she might learn that he will do his chores in his own time. She’s going to have to learn patience and to not resent him when she willingly does his chores for him. He’s also going to have to learn that she won’t always do his chores and to not try to wait her out until she can’t take it anymore. Not like I did that to my own sister, or anything…